I tried to tell you this before, but you just don't listen to me. Oh, I'm sorry, for a second I was getting you folks confused with my pre-teen son. And his never-wrong father.
Anyway, as I was saying, I mentioned this in an earlier column but was generally jeered. However, I now have proof that Facebook is the root of all evil.
Sure, sure - you see the jokes and the photos and the word games and think it's super fun OK, so do I sometimes.
But it's clear that, as Pinteresting as it is to poke, post and otherwise publicize your status - there's more than meets the eye on certain Facebook pages. I mean, if cotton is the fabric of our lives, methinks Facebook is the potentially toxic lead thread woven into its seams especially now that it seems to be getting a big "dislike" on Wall Street. Oops, digression.
Back to the matter at hand, I find it hugely disturbing that Facebook is apparently a factor in roughly one in three divorces. Holy unnecessary bust-ups, Batman!
According to a U.K. survey by the legal services firm called Divorce Online, more than a third of divorce filings last year contained the word "Facebook."
Still unconvinced and thinking it's strictly an across-the-pond phenomenon?
Then, how can you explain this: the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers' recently revealed that more than 80 percent of U.S. divorce attorneys see a steady upward trend in the number of cases that reference "social networking" hmm?
Better make that hmpf.
Some of my nearest and dearest agree that Facebook's bad for couples, period. My pals Charleen Scott (formerly of Trumbull County) and Chris Ruggieri of Warren and the husband of my buddy Jessica Bloss of Beloit are all standing firm on this: no profiles for them, thanks anyway.
Perhaps Facebook founder / CEO Mark Zuckerberg should steer his new bride away from his brainchild at least until the honeymoon ends?
This may be especially useful considering that, according to his recent "60 Minutes" interview, Zuckerberg's own homepage contains a little white lie. Seems he claims to be a graduate of Harvard - the very school from which he dropped out to start the virtual entity that's connecting so many people ... to their divorce attorneys.
Look, just because the average user has 130 Facebook friends (except my sister, who has about four million) doesn't mean she / he is necessarily e-flirting with all of them does it?
It's like I always say, if you wouldn't want your significant other to hear or read it, you shouldn't be saying or writing it. But, at the end of the day, Facebook doesn't cause marital discord - it's just that some people are using its powers for bad rather than good.
My advice? Treat it like table salt. A little bit for flavor sparingly is fine but over-indulge and you're just begging for trouble down the road, Facebook friends.
Kimerer is a Tribune Chronicle columnist. Check out her monogamy-friendly Facebook page or just drop her a line about how much you adore your significant other at email@example.com.